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My last post came at an interesting time for more than myself.

With graduations abound, several friends and family had intoxicated themselves to one level or another. Nothing bad has come of it, at least in my estimation of situations.

The most I’ve seen is that same dogged behavior where alcohol combines with sincerity and releases social anxiety such that one can speak importantly about unimportant things. You know, the phrases that start with ‘seriously though, don’t’ you think…’ and ramble on for discoveries no one will remember 4 hours and 5 Ibuprofen later.

The moments pass, things have been expunged, ostracized and cured in a way that is without memory and concern. Well, unless you are me. I heard a great deal of things, but I love that people can be driven to a level of sincerity like that. This, after all, is where the fond tales of drunken buddies and pals stems from. These connections, while vanished in modern memory, leave a trace of residual admiration or mutual fear of exposure that could never be found soberly, or without large caliber weapons to threaten each other with.

I graduated last weekend. Well, I partook in the ceremony of graduation last weekend. I walked down hills, across stages and shook hands of important people whom I have no ties with at all. The truth is, I have a summer left and a busy one at that.

I watched peers rejoice so happily over the end of what they don’t realize to be some of the best times in their lives. I was only semi-excited at the ceremonies, but elated that family members were given opportunity to see and hear that I had actually finished something of great task. I was certainly more excited over that then the Chancellor’s speech that was given to the 133rd graduating class of the University of Kansas.

My favorite part was the mention of student strife and struggle. These were stories of those who were like Rocky except punching out grades instead of… well.. basically other Rockys’. These were students who were black, or working, or mothers or working mothers. Frankly, I heard no inspiration from any of that. My story is no painful struggle of unreasonable proportion, but it certainly could be construed as much tougher than these fine individuals had it.

This pairs up nicely with another fine pain in news I felt today. While meeting with my new co-workers, I viewed one of the final news casts for KUJH-TV news about prescription drug abuse during finals. We are talking about kids who buy Ritalin or the like to gain an edge in final exams and studying hours into the late night.

The report did a few things well followed by a few things very badly. To my amazement, several students went on the record about ingesting these drugs for studying and/or selling them to those who don’t need the medications. That was awesome. To my dismay, it missed a chance to nail down the issue. I will expand it to this post’s purpose.

Life is what you make of it….. and some shit you just have to take

You know, they barely had any serious side effects of ‘doing’ prescription medications of Ritalin and the like without consulting a doctor, and I’m only slightly hesitant to say that the risks really aren’t that high, at least in some of the newer drugs. After all, it is the purpose of the FDA to help ensure that all new drugs have a safety factor of acceptable numbers to them. These drugs have been around awhile, and abused in much more potent forms with, as expected, increased devastation. Basically, and you can see in the report, there were no compelling numbers of deaths or tragic examples that would make you wonder about your mortality before popping that pill for an ‘A’ day.

We are talking about speed here, and I’m not advocating this behavior in any way. Legal disclaimer aside, I’m upset that the real problem wasn’t presented. When you deal with issues of the body and try to figure out what the problem is, you come up with something called a differential diagnosis. It’s basically a list of the possible problems that extend from the presented symptoms and test results done thus far.

A college student wanting to do speed to enhance test results is not a problem, it is a symptom. Drug use is rarely the ‘problem’ but more like an indicator of something a person is going through, or avoiding going through or several other possibilities.

In life, after college, I wonder what these kids are going to do when the ante is higher? I’m not worried about them risking liver damage, because their lives are worse off before that problem is likely to affect them. They think they need a performance edge that they won’t have to find out in the, apparently, much safer, warmer and relaxed real world.

This is the issue to which I have concern now. I wonder what I can do to enlighten this perception. I’m all for finding the greatest advantage in any situation, but disadvantaging your future psychology because you always fail to perform as well as you do ‘high’ is intolerable and moronic. Honestly, I’d prefer the drugs to be used for recreational enjoyment, and I’d prefer to live life performing at whatever capability I’m at.

Graduation, as happy a moment as my degree is in my life, wasn’t a party for me. The party I did have was much more real. I sat with friends and family, engaging in the kinds of conversations that remind people we connect in real and tangible ways. Honestly, I’d ridicule someone who put too much stock in that silly peace of paper I’ll have on a wall in the near future.

The accomplishment wasn’t a degree or a certificate, but surviving by learning how to work with friends and loved ones for mutual successes. In my toasting speech to family and friends, I said I couldn’t have finished without these people in my life.

Theseus, my dear friend, said “we all know that isn’t true, but thanks.” It sounds cold, but if you don’t know the guy, it’s this candor I appreciate, because he speaks his mind.

Well, in return for that result, I will admit I can’t say what would have happened without them in my life. I have a strong will about me and I wasn’t raised to quite quickly. But having them as friends, and my family that I had no choice over, was, without question, a part of the system by which I did succeed.

I don’t know that I can ever claim any success as solely my own, and I don’t think I want to. That’s the path of a lonely rebel, the likes of which we all admire too quickly but would never really want to try doing. My friends and family provided me with drive, encouraging words, inspiration, anger and happiness in amounts that must surely have been from a fine recipe.

I don’t know the what-ifs’, just what did happen. I can tell them, and you, this much. I never took speed or any other chemical for advantage in school. Coping with things is a whole new topic, but my success was and is based on heart. I have no doubt in my mind that I can perform exactly as I expect to every day of my life, so long as I have my friends and my family about me.

Only a final note, because there are those who would want me to speak to this. When I say friends and family, I mean even the ones who went out of their way to piss me off, or fail me or doubt me in evil or uncaring ways. Hate is a consuming leech for which I have little time to entertain. I appreciate, in odd ways, the position I hold in so many peoples’ eyes. They gave me practice at the most important character trait you can own.

Integrity.